Let Go of External Validation by Abodunrin Basheeroh

We live in a time where it feels almost natural to look for approval. Before making a decision, we wonder,

What will people say?”

Before acting, we pause to consider how others might react. Even when we are doing something good, we sometimes check who is watching, filtering our actions through people’s opinions.

Slowly, this becomes a habit.

And before we know it, our self-worth starts depending on reactions from people who may not even understand our intentions or our struggles.

Here is a truth many of us avoid: you cannot build a stable life on the unstable opinions of people.

People change their minds. They get distracted. They forget. They misjudge. If your confidence is tied to them, it will go up and down like a switch controlled by everyone but you.

Islam teaches us to anchor ourselves to something more reliable. Allah says:

“And Allah is sufficient as a Witness.” (Qur’an 4:79)

This verse reminds us that your effort, your sincerity, your improvement, and your struggles are always seen by Allah, even when nobody acknowledges them. You don’t need a loud audience for your deeds to have value.

The Prophet ﷺ also said:

“Allah looks at your hearts and your deeds.” (Muslim)

The world may judge your appearance, your past mistakes, or how fast you progress, but Allah judges your sincerity and intention. That alone should bring a deep sense of relief.
Letting go of external validation doesn’t mean you ignore advice or stop caring about people. It means you stop tying your self-worth to their approval. It means you choose actions that please Allah, even if people don’t clap for you.

Think about it:

How many times have you held back from doing good out of fear of being judged?

How often have you doubted yourself because someone failed to appreciate your effort?

How many decisions have you delayed because you were worried about people’s opinions?

Meanwhile, Allah sees the effort behind every small step you take. The good you do in private counts. The changes you make silently count. The intentions in your heart count.

When you stop seeking validation from people, several things happen:

• You become more confident because your standards come from your values, not pressure.

• You feel lighter because you’re no longer trying to satisfy everyone.

• You grow spiritually because your actions become more sincere for Allah.

• You make clearer choices because you’re not clouded by fear of criticism.

People may misunderstand your journey, but Allah never will.

People may overlook your progress, but Allah records every bit of it.

People may forget your consistency, but Allah rewards it.

So yes, listen to advice, respect people, and take feedback when needed. But don’t let your entire identity depend on how others see you.

At the end of the day, the only approval that truly matters is Allah’s.

And living with that focus brings a level of confidence and peace that no amount of external validation can match.